Deep within the trenches of diaper hell I held out hope that at least one of my children would be potty trained...........

My sister-in-law had given me some sound advice, the little potty was ready, the big potty with the adjustable ring was poised for duty and the thick cotton training pants were held fast within my grasp.

Day one, I spent the day with a potty in my livingroom. Using all my masterful skills to persuade a two year old that it was okay to sit on it.

Day two, I used bribery (his favorite T.V. Show) to get the little guy to sit on the potty (still in my livingroom) fully clothed. My strategy worked for about 5 minutes.

Day three, I resorted to chasing buddy around with the training pants and pleading with him. "Don't you want to be a big boy and wear big boy panties?" He was firm in his response, "No! Me Wear Diapers!"

Day four, I moved the potty into the bathroom and got him to sit bare butt on it for a few minutes, nothing happened. "Me Wear Diapers!" he said.

Day five, he decided to try the potty, but not the little one, he wanted to be like mamma and daddy and sit on the big one.

Day six, got it down. Learned how to sit and pee on the potty today, no more diapers!

Day seven, still going good, wearing training pants and no accidents, not even at night.

Day eight, he's a big boy now! All that's left is for daddy to teach him how to pee standing up!

I still checked with him hourly to remind him to use the potty, but no accidents at all. Wow! this worked out great!

(the time frame may have been several weeks, it has been condensed to tell our story) (Buddy is a nickname for the child in the story, so as not to reveal his true identity) (The sister-in-law advised that most children who are neurotypical are ready to be potty trained around age three) (Children with special needs may take much longer) (thick cotton training pants work best for potty training, pull-ups are too absorbent, like diapers and regular underwear is too thin and will leak) (Buddy at the time of potty training was closer to age three then two) (the story is true, Buddy is now in his 20's and has never had an accident since) (don't worry most children don't go away to college wearing diapers)

I wish you well on your potty journey........

• You know your a Mommie when you drive a mini-van and you like it!
• You have to schedule a "date night" to spend time with your babies daddy.
• You go to bed at 9:00 o'clock because your tired.
• The last time you bought something new for yourself was three years ago.
• You get kicked out of the Macaroni Grill because your kid is disturbing other diners.
• An old man at the library tells YOU to be quiet!! because your making too much noise yelling at your kid.
• You finally understand why that women at KMART was telling her kid she was gonna "kill him" as he threw a fit in the aisle.
• You find yourself singing the title song to "Sponge Bob Square Pants" while your stuck in traffic.
• You spend time with your BFF talking about the texture and color of your kids poo!
• Your favorite drink is Koolaid.
• You get kicked out of a bar for bringing your baby in.
• You can't wait to finish breast-feeding so you can drink margaritas!
• Your sofa used to be white!
• You get peed on changing a diaper!
• The only manicure you get is the one your 3 year old paints on your nails.
• You have a baby on board sitcker on your car.
• You've lost the ability to relate to anyone over the age of 5.
• You find yourself saying the things your mother said to you!
• Your kid flush's random things down the toilet.
• You enroll your kids in activities just be rid of them.
• The only trip you take is to the doctors.
• You only watch G rated movies.
• You know all of the characters in Dora the Explorer.
• You have a family pass to the zoo.
• Your house has more toys then a toy store.
• The last book you read was Doctor Seuss