The first year of life with Audra was scary, confusing and filled with screams, hers, not mine.

For some reason and I don't know why, Audra sceamed almost non-stop all day, every day and long into the night.....

Once, years later my husband asked me if I remembered how much Audra screamed? I looked at him blankly, "Well I remember she screamed an awful lot" I said, "but no I can't really remember it. "

I guess I was just to darn tired to remember it or perhaps my mind has blocked out those scream filled years.... At any rate Audra would scream if you laid her down, scream if you carried her around, rocked her, walked her,sang to her, talked to her. She would scream in the car seat, scream at the doctors, while visiting relatives or friends or for any other reason that she saw fit.

I am sure there were times when she didn't scream. When she slept peacefully in my arms, smiled and giggled at our antics to entertain her or was happily full of rice cereal.

I have met other mother's of children who have cerebral palsy who have expereinced the same thing the first year of life or so.

A child who would or could not stop screaming. We have bantered around our therories.

Could it be that thier little brains are neurologicaly mixed up and need time to heal and settle down?

Are they having trouble eating and are they hungry?

Are they physically in pain or uncomfortable?

Are we just bad parents who can't soothe our babies?

Is it really colic, like the doctors said?

If we could come up with the answer we would be able to help other parents who are going through the same screaming infant/child nightmare right now.

The best that I can say, is that eventually the children I know and Audra, as well, grew out of this screaming nightmare to be (almost) pleasant children.

For those parents going through this right now the good news is;

It will end eventually!

You will survive!

20 years from now you won't really remember it!

You are not a bad parent because your infant cries!

Some ways I found to deal with it were;

Putting Audra safely in her crib and taking a time out by vacuming the house (this way I couldn't hear her crys) I never did this for long, because she would get really worked up and sweaty and stuffed up.

Putting her safely in her crib and taking a quick shower (this way I couldn't hear her cry)

Taking her for a walk outside, which sometimes would soothe her.

Calling in the reinforcements, Grandma and Grandpa to carry her around for a while.

Trying to distract her with toys and activities, especially at the doctors office or some other appointment.

Talking and singing to her and being silly.

Ear plugs were helpful, and an ipod would be as well.

I wish you good luck!